New HR Policy!!!

EFFECTIVE AUGUST 1, 2008
NEW OFFICE POLICY
Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to
your salary.
2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a
Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially
and therefore do not need a raise.
3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your
money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and
therefore you do not need a raise.
4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need
to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof
of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturdays & Sundays.
Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing
you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every
effort should be made to have non-employees attend the
funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where
employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be
scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and
subsequently leave one hour early.
Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the
stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will
sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall
door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
second offense, your picture will be posted on the
company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders'
category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sectioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a
balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's
all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here
to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations,
allegations, accusations, contemplations, c onsternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management
Pass this on to all who are still employed!

Falling Sick

I really made a mess out of myself. Pun intended to take MC tomorrow (integrity lost), however, today really fall sick. Got a meeting at 3 later with AMEX. Shit, I am going to pass that virus to everyone in the room later, so it's 'Public Holiday' tomorrow for all of you guys.

Tonite got 3 million toto, intended to get a few pieces for 'us'.

Who knows? I might turn out to be a millionaire tomorrow.

Then all my $$ problems will vanish....

SHit...................................

BEING A MOTHER

After 17 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to
Take another woman out to dinner and a movie.
She said, 'I love you, but I know this other woman
Loves you and would love to spend some time with you.'
* * *
The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit
Was my MOTHER, who has been alone for 20 years,
But the demands of my work and my two boys had
Made it possible to visit her only occasionally.
* * *
That night I called to invite her to go out for
Dinner and a movie.
* * *
'What's wrong, aren't you well,' she asked?
* * *
My mother is the type of woman who suspects that
A late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news.
* * *
'I thought it would be pleasant to spend some time with you,
' I responded. 'Just the two of us.'
She thought about it for a moment, and then Said, 'I would like that very
much.'
* * *
That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick
Her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at
Her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be
Nervous about our date. She waited in the door. She had
Curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had
Worn to celebrate her last birthday on November 19th.
* * *
She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an
Angel's'. 'I told my friends that I was going to
Go out with my son, and they were impressed,' she
Said, as she got into that new white van. 'They can't
Wait to hear about our date'.
* * *
We went to a restaurant that, although not
Elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took
My arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat
Down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only
Read large print. Half way through the entries, I lifted
My eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring
At me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. 'It was I
Who used to have to read the menu when you were
Small,' she said. 'Then it's time that you relax and
Let me return the favor,' I responded.
* * *
During the dinner, we had an agreeable
Conversation- -nothing extraordinary but catching up on
Recent events of each other's life. We talked so much
That we missed the movie.
* * *
As we arrived at her house later, she said, 'I'll
Go out with you again, but only if you let me
Invite you.' I agreed.
* * *
'How was your dinner date ?' asked my wife when
I got home. 'Very nice. Much more so than I could have
Imagined,' I answered.
* * *
A few days later, my mother died of a massive
Heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't
Have a chance to do anything for her.

* * *
Some time later, I received an envelope with a
Copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place
Mother and I had dined. An attached note said:
'I paid this bill in advance. I wasn't sure that I
Could be there; but nevertheless, I paid for two
Plates - one for you and the other for your wife.
You will never know what that night meant for
Me. I love you, son.'
* * *
At that moment, I understood the importance
Of saying in time: 'I LOVE YOU' and to give our
Loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life
Is more important than your family. Give them the
Time they Des erve, because these things cannot be put
Off till 'some other time.'

* * *
Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get
Back to normal after you've had a baby.... Somebody
Doesn't know that once you're a mother, 'normal' is history.
* * *
Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by
Instinct . Somebody never took a three-year-old
Shopping.
* * *
Somebody said being a mother is boring ....somebody never rode in a car
driven by a
Teenager with a driver's permit.

* * *
Somebody said if you're a 'good' mother,
Your child will 'turn out good'....
Somebody thinks a child comes with
Directions and a guarantee.
* * *
Somebody said you don't need an education to be
A mother.... Somebody never helped a fourth grader
With his math.
* * *
Somebody said you can 't love the s econd child as
Much as you love the first .... somebody doesn't
have two children.
* * *
Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother
is labor and delivery....
somebody never watched her 'baby' get on the bus
for the first day of kindergarten .
or on a plane headed for military 'boot camp.'
* * *
Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after
her child gets married....somebody doesn't know that
marriage adds a new son or daughter-in- law to a
mother's heartstrings.
* * I love this xxxxxx*
Somebody said a mother's job is done when her
last child leaves home....somebody never had
grandchildren.
* * *
Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so
you don't need to tell her.... somebody isn't a
mother.
This isn't just about being a mother; it's about
appreciating the people in your life while you have them....no matter who that person is.

How we used to be proud to be a Malaysian - Hari Ini Dalam Sejarah

'Tunku Yes, Sukarno No'

KUALA LUMPUR, Sept 16 - Some 45 years ago, the formation of Malaysia took some time and Tunku Abdul Rahman stayed the deadline past Merdeka Day 1963 to allow United Nations to finish its survey of responses in Borneo.Singapore had already declared Independence from Britain on Aug 31, 1963 and had placed itself in trusteeship ahead of the formation of Malaysia. TIME magazine, in a dispatch dated Sept 6, 1963, reported this:In steamy, palm-shaded Kuching, capital of Sarawak, the day's biggest excitement is the firing of the 8pm cannon on the lawn of government house. "What a dull place," said a United Nations official. "I don't know how we're going to survive three weeks here." At the insistence of Indonesia's President Sukarno, an eight-member UN team is present to "ascertain" whether Sarawak and North Borneo really want to join the Federation of Malaysia, which Sukarno bitterly opposes. As the UN ascertainers began to sample opinions around Sarawak, they were nearly stoned, not bored, to death.

In the Chinese-dominated town of Sibu, the Red-infiltrated Sarawak United People's Party (SUPP) staged a demonstration that turned into a 90-minute, stone-throwing riot. Only after police fired warning shots to disperse the mob could the UN team sit down - amidst broken glass in a Methodist schoolhouse - to interview local councilors. In Miri, Sarawak's oil-refining centre, 3,000 Chinese-SUPPorted youths, wielding stones and bottles, screamed anti-Malaysia slogans until the police opened fire, wounding two, and tear gas forced them to scatter.Such outbursts will slightly delay but not derail the formation of Malaysia, originally scheduled for Aug 31. In last summer's general elections, voters in both Sarawak and North Borneo decisively defeated anti-federation parties. Although Indonesia's shadow looms large, the Borneo people know they have nothing to gain from Djakarta but economic chaos and demagoguery.

Malayan Prime Minister Tunku Abdul Rahman and British Colonial Secretary Duncan Sandys, who hastily flew to the scene, last week set Sept 16 as the new birth date for the federation - two days after the UN mission's findings will be made public. Both are sure that the UN will find a clear majority in favour of Malaysia, but they insist that the federation will come into being regardless of the report. The British last week also turned over internal self-government to Borneo and Sarawak.In a wrangle over details with the British, Indonesia failed to send observers to the UN mission, thus giving Sukarno an excuse to question the UN findings later. But faced with British determination to defend Malaysia by force, if necessary, Sukarno said: "If the Borneo peoples agree to join Malaysia, we will have to bow our heads and obey." But, added Sukarno, in an unbowed postscript: "Indonesia maintains its opposition to Malaysia."

An Indonesian guerrilla campaign against Borneo and Sarawak may well continue, since Djakarta always needs a foreign diversion to draw attention from domestic difficulties. In Indonesian Borneo, which adjoins Sarawak, Sukarno has set up guerrilla camps along 200 miles of border, and is training 1,000 Red-lining Chinese from Sarawak, following the guidelines of Indonesian Defense Minister General Abdul Haris Nasution, an expert on guerrilla warfare who has written his own book on the subject. Bands of his guerrillas pushed across the border to raid Dyak villages, clashed with patrols of British-led Gurkhas and Sarawak police. In a fire fight ten miles inside Sarawak, the Indonesians killed a British lieutenant and wounded several Gurkhas before being routed with heavy losses. Meanwhile, British officers are studying Nasution's book for clues to stop further Indonesian incursions.

So far, Indonesian terrorist attacks have only served to create a surge of pro-Malaysia feeling in Borneo and Sarawak. Almost nightly, the Indonesian embassy in North Borneo is plastered with slogans reading "Tunku Yes, Sukarno No." Although his people stopped head-hunting years ago, one Dyak chief told the UN fact finders that "if any more Indonesian bandits come into our territory, they may lose their heads." - TIME

I Salute you

You must be one of the few politicians that I really respect, Datuk Zaid Ibrahim. For what you have did, I salute you....

Malaysia Insider
KUALA LUMPUR, Sept 15 - Datuk Zaid Ibrahim, the de facto Law Minister, has tendered his resignation to the Prime Minister, a day after criticising the use of the Internal Security Act (ISA) to arrest three individuals last Friday.

Tu Lan

I have actually wanted to post this since last week, but since there are more twist in Malaysia for the whole last weekend, I thought I might just add it in as well..

Tulan, this is one word that I effectively learnt from Singaporean. When u felt annoyed, angry, frustrated, you can just say it loud, Tulan!!!!!

Tulan!!!When I came over for the interview, he promised that I'll got lot to learn at here.. I have actually turn down another offer to come over here. An offer with a better pay. And how regret I am now.. Doing PURELY administration works, data entry sort of work. Damn waste.. Still, luckily the pay is not a data entry clerk pay. Then still add in a lot of data entry works for me.. New project! New opportunity to learn. MY COCK!!! Another data entry work. Damn Tulan.. When I told my gf I'll be leaving early for work every morning, she asked me what it's for. When I told her this, she said,' You are doing data entry now??' Damn paiseh.....

If my planning go accordingly, I'll be leaving pretty soon. That's my ultimate goal. Bonus? Don't care lar, i'll be making more money!!!!

Australia's media said it!!!Our Gov are 'Pain in the ***"

Thought of the day

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet.
He held up a sign which said: 'I am blind, please help.'
There were only a few coins in the hat.
A man was walking by.
He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat.
He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words.
He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.
Soon the hat began to fill up.
A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy.
That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were.
The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, 'Were you the one who changed my sign this morning?
What did you write?'
The man said, 'I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.'
What he had written was: 'Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it.'

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing?
Of course both signs told people the boy was blind.
But the first sign simply said the boy was blind.
The second sign told people they were so lucky that they were not blind.
Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?
Moral of the Story: Be thankful for what you have. Be creative. Be innovative. Think differently and positively.
Invite others towards good with wisdom.
Live life with no excuse and love with no regrets.
When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile.
Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear. Keep the faith and drop the fear.

Great men say, 'Life has to be an incessant process of repair and reconstruction, of discarding evil and developing goodne ss .... In the journey of life, if you want to travel without fear, you must have the ticket of a good conscience.'
The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling...
And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

Politicians

What can you expect from a typical politician? We should all know that these are the people who like to play politics to their benefits. Extremist, yes, that's the suitable word to describe them. Care less about their people.

The latest outburst in Malaysia about Ahmad Ismail is just another sample of extremist politician. Some people said he is stupid to play up this issue, but my opinion is that this guy is damn smart. He is sure by now, getting more and more supports and attentions. I bet, in the next UMNO election, he will sure goes up in rank. That's his actual motif, I suspect. Now, all these bullshits of pushing the blames to the media of playing with his speech. Damn you!! Najib was there. He sure heard all that Ahmad Ismail said. That's why he came out and apologise. He didn't apologised because he read it from the newspaper. He apologised because he heard it!! I suspect, if this issue is to go on, May 13 might become a reality once again. Then, where Malaysia will go? Investors?

I guess, we are still not in the right mindset of Independent....

Wastage

Last weekend, we went back to Malaysia to have a look at our newly born god daughter. She's so cute, so small. Oh my god, they are with the same batch with us during our university days and now they are having baby. Must really admit that I have really 'olding'. Hehe, I am still in my 20s lar...

In the way up using the North South Highway, I noticed one thing that most of you must be wondering everytime you guys are using the highway. You see, when you go through the toll booth, surely there is a staff there collecting money. Did you ever wonder, can't we just replaced all these with machines? Why can't everyone just use Touch and Go. Why must we waste these payroll for these people doing nothing? It's really a wastage especially those that are issuing tickets. Why can't they just use a machine (those that you will always see at the carpark), just press a button and the ticket come out. Dude, just as simple as that. Waste the payroll, then complaint not making money and then request for toll increament.. Silly...

A man's worst Nightmare

After a long night of making love, Danny rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.Unable to find it, he asked Sheila if she had one at hand."There might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied.
He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man.Naturally, the guy began to worry. "Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously."No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him."Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear."Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy.
Calmly, Sheila replied, "That's me before the operation."

Shit!!!

Damn!!! Shit!!! Whatever.....

I am really feeling lost right now. Poor health, poor money management, wrong step in career.....

What the f*ck am I doing now? Nothing seems to be right... I have to cool down for a moment and really think of what I want and sort it out. Otherwise, it's really wasting time.

I have been to the CENTRE yesterday, but really don't know what am I doing there. Wanted to pull out but due to some reasons, I just can't. Have to hold on for a while. Until it's over, then I swear I will pull out. It is actually hindering my movement. Nothing to lost anyway... Just a few friends...

Lost in Transition

First of all, to all the visitor of this blog, hope that you'll forgive me for my low command in English and try to bear on it. What to do, born a Malaysian (you know lar, Malaysian are supposed to be good in Bahasa). Guess I need to catch up on improving my English as I am currently working in Singapore (you know lar, poor english in Singapore, and you might end up holding a bowl along the street).

Okay, firstly, a short introduction on myself. Not too handsome, not too ugly, not too fat, not too tall, not too tall, not too thin, not too clever, not too stupid. Conclusion, I m just a man.

My inspiration of starting this blog came after reading the posting on Love & Horny Horny. I'll try to link to him afterall later.

Read on, I'll try to blog as regular as possible.