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Monday, June 29, 2009
10 Rules for One Night Stand
1. ALWAYS have Condoms with you:You will feel kinda stupid, huh? All that time to convince her, and now….NOTHING! Don’t even think about sleeping with the person without protection. You don’t want to RISK your life for a few hours (if you’re lucky) of pleasure!
2. Do NOT give them your phone number:
The last think you need is a stalker on your back! You need to be fast and sneaky! The less you know about this person (and the less they know about you!) the better one night stand you will make.
3. They MUST be a stranger:
Well don’t mess with your friends! It will become more complicated in case you or the other one starts to have feelings.
4. Do NOT be drunk:
You don’t have to care if he or she is drunk, but you don’t have to be! Have you ever seen how an ugly face transforms into a beautiful one with a fifth of vodka?
5. Do NOT go to your place:
Are you insane? All that time you’ve been trying to hide by not giving your phone number, and you bring your flirt to your place? Wrong! A nice hotel will do the trick, if you like it outdoors, also not a problem. Just don’t go to some place familiar! There is a chance that you will never get rid of them afterwards.
6. Do NOT use your car:
A car is like a symbol! He or she will never forget it! You don’t want every time you’re parked outside a restaurant with someone else to see that person again running towards you! You are too old to be hiding under tables!
7. Do NOT eat anything weird before:
You want to spend some time with that person; not with the porcelain altar! So be careful of your choices. A good salad (without onions or garlic) will do great for that day. Remember: flatulence is NOT a turn-on.
8. Do NOT fall asleep:
You may awake and see an ugly face staring at you. Or even worst, a table full of breakfast ready for both of you to enjoy… Your identity will be exposed, since you were sleeping like a pig and he or she was searching through your stuff! You will also realize that this one night stand might have been a mistake, after all… so be sneaky: do your ninja moves, try to leave the place without anyone noticing.
9. Do NOT leave any tracks:
Be sure that you won’t leave anything behind when you leave! A T-shirt, a lighter, a pair of gloves, even your used protection will be enough for the other person to search the entire world to find you! Anything you will forget might be used against you - learn from all those CSI episodes you’ve spent so much time on!
10. Do NOT kiss them when you leave:
In case that you failed to do something of the above, this would be one huge mistake! That would mean something more than a simple One Night Stand!
So people enjoy your single status, follow the rules, have fun and be happy!
Friday, June 26, 2009
10 reasons why F1 race can be held at the new Johor Bahru CIQ
MICHEAL JACKSON DEAD!!!
Pop icon Michael Jackson died Thursday after suffering a cardiac arrest, the entertainment website TMZ.com reported.
Jackson, 50, suffered a heart attack just after 12:00 pm (1900 GMT) local time and paramedics were unable to revive him.
It's a bad day for us, I will try to look out for his album tonight..Another day has gone
I'm still all alone
How could this be
You are not here with me........
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Malaysia Citizenship Renouncing
So your application for Singapore Citizenship has been approved. What's next?
The process of renouncing your Malaysian Citizenship is as follows:
Once you received the approval letter from ICA, take the letter to the Malaysian High Commission (MHC) at 301 Jervois Road. Direct bus number 32 from UE Square or the bus stop next to the GMX Reverse Bungee at Clarke Quay.
You will be given an appointment date (usually 1-2 months later) for your renunciation submission. You will be given a set of forms and a checklist on what documents you need to bring along with you for your submission.
Do bring along your birth certificate (have it laminated) on your first trip to MHC as the type of documents needed would depend on what's written on your birth certificate.Next, on your appointment date, submit the forms, the necessary documents, and photocopies including 3 recent passport-sized photographs with blue background. You will be asked to pay S$6 for this stage. Take note that all documents are to be photostated in A4 size. .
Keep copies of all your Malaysian passports (including expired ones) and NRIC as these will not be returned to you. You will be asked to return in approximately 7 working days later to collect the renunciation letter and a certified copy of your birth certificate.
If you lost any of the required documents, do not just tell the counter staff that you cannot provide it as it is not available. They will request you to go and make a police report and it will cause you more trouble! So, get the police report ready if you are missing or lost any required documents.
This letter is sufficient for formalizing your Singaporean Citizenship, including getting your pink NRIC. The official citizenship renunciation document (Form K) will be ready only two years later - MHC will send you a letter when it is ready (the original birth certificate will be returned to you along with Form K). The ICA is aware of this but would still require you to submit the Form K two years later to retain your Singapore citizenship.
Please update MHC by write in to them if your mailing address has changed.
Form K is also necessary if you have funds in the Malaysian EPF that you would like to withdraw.
It is a hassle (multiple trips to MHC) but the consular staff is polite, and the instructions are pretty clear (and in English).
Altogether, there will be 3 trips to MHC!
Once it is processed. You will go down to MHC again in about 7 days between 2.30 - 3.30pm to collect the Renunciation Letter
You will get a copy of your Birth Certificate with 'Certified True Copy' from the Malaysian High Commission.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Things you probably never knew your mobile phone could do
1) The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out.
2) Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their mobile phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, holding it near the mobile phone on their end. Your car will unlock. This saves someone from having to drive your keys to you. Distance is no object. You could be hundreds of miles away, and if you can reach someone who has the other 'remote' for your car, you can unlock the doors (or the trunk).
3) Imagine your mobile battery is very low. To activate, press the keys *3370#. Your mobile will restart with this reserve and the instrument will show a 50% increase in battery. This reserve will get charged when you charge your mobile next time.
4) To check your mobile phone's serial number, key in the following digits on your phone!: * # 0 6 #, a 15 digit code will appear on the screen. This number is unique to your handset. Write it down and keep it somewhere safe. When your phone stolen, you can phone your service provider and give them this code. They will then be able to block your handset so even if the thief changes the SIM card, your phone will be totally useless. You probably won't get your phone back, but at least you know that whoever stole it can't use/sell it either. If everybody does this, there would be no point in people stealing mobile phones.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
We will rather burn the bridge than to sell sand to...
Anyone following the news will know that Singapore Mentor Minister, is currently in Malaysia, visiting state officers and government officials. Initially, it was a great news for everyone as the outcome of the visit is very positive and it could signal more cooperation between the two country.
However, this morning, there was a statement from the Malaysia ruling party, UMNO that they will rather burn the bridge than to sell sands to Singapore.
A lot of people will wonder why the ruling party, UMNO hated Singapore so much. There has been no war between them and no direct confrontation. But out of nothing, there will be quote on Singapore.
The issue is not selling sand to Singapore but making use of Singapore as an external enemy to galvanise support for the larger agenda of Malay unity therefore perpetuating Ketuanan Melayu policy. You see Singapore is seen a Chinese bastion in Malay Archipelago and a bloody thorn in their behinds.
This is politic afterall...
Monday, June 15, 2009
Tips on how not to get drunk
If you’re young and don’t have a personal or religious problem with alcohol, then the truth is that you’ll eventually drink some. Depending on your entourage, even a lot of: You’ll go to parties where people drink beer, whiskey, wine or others. You’ll end up seeing guys running naked in the backyard, girls throwing their drunken guts out, or even - God forbid - teenagers falling into alcoholic coma. You DON’T want to be one of them. Being dead drunk may seem exciting for an 21 year old going in a bar with his first REAL ID card, but it’s NOT.
Like most guys around, I occasionally get to a bar with a bunch of friends, talking, joking, and drinking beers. I’ve even had my 18′th birthday in a bar, my college graduation and most special events. In my entire life, I only got sick two times because of drinking too much beer. I’ve never fallen unconscious, I was always able to walk back home, most frequently soberer than my friends.
The following tips come from my feeble experience, some of them were taught to me by my father when I first went to a party, some of them by my friends, some of them it’s just stuff I learned around. So… how can you survive an alcohol drinking party with just enough soberness not to feel bad, sick, or fall prey to embarrasing moment
Tip 1. Never go drink on an empty stomach
I told you I got sick twice from too much drinking. To be honest, though, I didn’t drink that much. Both times, the real reason was that I hadn’t eaten anything before getting to the party. No, chips, peanuts and other tiny snacks are not FOOD. Alcohol absorption is increased by hunger, you get more dizzy from one beer on an empty stomach feels than from two on a full one.
Tip 2. You decide how much you drink, not your friends
It’s not a contest. You DON’T need to drink all the beers your friends give you. Not all men/women are born equal. Some hold their liquor better than others. If you start feeling bad, but your friends insist to keep drinking, just STOP. Go drink some juice or water instead. This applies especially to skinny people - alcohol absorption is dependent on the body structure/weight, which also means generally girls are less alcohol resistant than boys. (though I’ve met plenty of exceptions as well)
Tip 3. Make it last longer
Nobody likes it short. If you finish your beer in a minute you’ll be the one not drinking while the others do, and you’ll feel compelled to get a new one. So, instead, make it last longer. Talk, take a sip, talk some more, eat some chips, talk some more. A cool tip one guy taught me was to mix beer and sprite - one bottle of beer, one of sprite, mixed 50/50 in one glass. It obviously lasts twice as long, yet you drink the same amount of alcohol. Your friends will not even notice.
Tip 4. Don’t mix the drinks and always eat between them
This is also well known - don’t drink strong liquor(whiskey) followed by beer, by champagne, by strong liquor, by beer, etc. You’ll get drunk, faster and uglier. You’ll get sick. So, don’t: never alternate drinks. At parties around here, for instance, we’d drink the stronger liquors(martini, whiskey and such) as an appetizer, then we’d eat the hors-d’oeuvres, followed by wine with the main course. If it takes longer, it would be followed by snacks and beer. In the end, if the case, the sweet wine/sparkling goes with the cake. Notice the rule? Don’t go back, and always eat between different drinks.
Tip 5. Oily food - less alcohol absorption
An oily esophagus/stomach absorbs less alcohol. This is a tip for the hard-core drunkards, but they probably know it already.
Tip 6. When dizzy, take a break
After three-four half-a-litter pints and not enough snacks in between I’d get dizzy and start having problems with equilibrium. It’s time for a break - walk out in fresh air, get some water on my face, stay a while in a quieter place. There’s no harm in it - just tell your buds you went to the loo.
Tip 7. When feeling sick, go throw up
If you didn’t follow through the previous tips, you may eventually feel really bad. The room is spinning, you feel a bit like wanting to throw up, only not quite so. The first time it happened it ruined the party for me. I would just sit in a corner, trying to clear my head and feel better. No success. Luckily, someone with more experience helped me - I went to the toilet and forced myself to throw up(one finger down the throat). After rejecting the alcohol in excess, and after freshing up, you’ll feel a lot better.
If you have other tips you want to share with us, just go ahead and comment below. As always, your input is welcome.
Thought of the day
"When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?"
The audience was stilled by the query.
The father continued. "I believe that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped, comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child." Then he told the following story:
Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, "Do you think they'll let me play?" Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to
be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.
Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked if Shay could play, not expecting much. The boy looked around for guidance and said, "We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth
inning."
Shay struggled over to the team's bench, put on a team shirt with a broad smile, and his Father had a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth
inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.
At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible 'cause Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.
However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing the other team putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least be able to make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.
The game would now be over, but the pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.
Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the head of the first baseman, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, "Shay, run to first! Run to first!" Never in his life had Shay ever ran that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.
Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to second!" Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to second base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball, the smallest guy on their team, who had a chance to be the hero for his team for the first time. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions and he too intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.
All were screaming, "Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay!"
Shay reached third base, the opposing shortstop ran to help him and turned him in the direction of third base, and shouted, "Run to third! Shay, run to third" As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams and those watching were on their feet and were screaming, "Shay, run home! Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the "grand slam" and won the game for his team.
"That day," said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, "the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world."
Shay didn't make it to another summer and died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his Father so happy and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Motorpay System (Singapore toll)
Since then, they have taken another step into a weird area. Now you can insert your credit card into the IU. You can register for that service at https://www.motorpay.com.sg/.
Everytime you get passed a Gantry, the ERP fees will be charged to your credit card and you make payment by the end of the month.
Get this straight: You don't actually put any credit card into your IU. You leave it empty, or leave your Cashcard in. The service is based on your vehicle ERP in-car unit number.
Now let's see what could go wrong with this system:
1) You sell the car, you forget to cancel the car's registration with Motorpay, you pay somebody's ERP for a couple of months before you remember.
2) You take a trip while your significant other maxes out on your card. Your earmarked amount runs out and you incur a fine everytime you pass a gantry.
3) You let your friend take your car for a couple of months, he racks up a thousand bucks of ERP, and you pay.
4) Suddenly, your credit card issuer blocks your card as you forgot to pay the credit card bill. You start getting a fine for every ERP gantry you pass through. Double whammy.
5) Cancellation of the service takes a week. You pass your car to your friend for a week. You pay the ERP.
All speculation, but valid ones. Welcome to post comments to correct my speculations.
From what I see, the Motorpay Web site sucks. The content is stupidly uninformative, with lousy crap content that nobody with my level of intelligence (pretty low, it seems) understands.
STILL, THE BEST WAY IS FOR LTA TO BILL YOU MONTHLY! I get multiple LTA bills per month, on a bad month, for insufficient balance in my Cashcard. If they're afraid of too much work, they would decrease the billing frequency immediately once they get rid of the Cashcard or credit card system, and just take note of my ERP gantry passes and bill me at the end of the month.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Attempt to cheat death??
Some people are terrified enough to spend vast amounts of money to put it off as long as possible with a new phenomena (mainly for the injured or terminally ill) by being cryogenically frozen.
This procedure can be done in California, (for approx. $120,000.00) the only place on the planet where cryogenic freezing is legal. The million-dollar question, however, is does it work? Well, not yet, according to Alcor. The idea is that because science is moving so fast, in just a few years they should have the technology to re-animate you, and repair all the damage done to your body as a result of being frozen at -220C. The human body is a very intricate and complex organism.
Every second of the day blood is being pumped around your body, delivering vital energy and nutrients to your cells. These cells have very limited energy reserves, so when your heart stops and the blood is no longer flowing, they quickly run out of nutrients and begin to succumb to toxic chemical reactions. The key point is that when subjected to extreme cold, these toxic reactions are greatly slowed down. By freezing the cells in liquid nitrogen, Alcor hopes to slow the decaying process down to a point where you can be theoretically be kept in cryostasis forever.
Their philosophy is that if a person’s body and brain cells are properly preserved, then that person is potentially alive, no matter how long they might have been clinically ‘dead’. There is still no proof whatsoever that we will ever possess the technology to bring those already frozen back to life.
The possibilities are frightening. The implications of people having massively extended lifespans have not yet been explored in detail - the few studies done all predict nothing but disaster for the planet as a whole. Until those with this obsessive fear of death come to grips with their own mortality, they will continue using their financial weight to steer science towards a confrontation with nature that we can never win.
So what do u guys think about this?
Part of me says what a bunch of fucking retards but another part of me thinks its a possibility. So i guess i've got mixed feelings about it. But imagine this, even if they brought you back to life, let's say a hundred years from now, what's so great about still being alive while all your friends, relatives including your love one are gone? Human just can't cheat death
Monday, June 8, 2009
海鳴威 - 我的回憶不是我的
傷心的總會任性
灰心的總會用氣力
將最好的過去將最多的細碎
鎖到屬于你的眼睛
失戀的不夠耐心
失戀的不信是注定
于最黑的世界
于最光的刹那感動
屬于你的氣息
即使很多一起過的
想起的通通你的
爲著是浪漫的愛情
通通都可再見但承諾可再聽
什麽可不變色
oh..baby
當晚與你記住蒲公英
今晚偏偏想起風的清勁
回憶不再受制于我我承認
回憶也許你的
當晚與你記住流水聲
今晚站在大地自己傾聽
難道送別你回頭總是虔誠
誰能怪我總是太感性
失戀的都有惰性
失戀的都記住約定
當理想的世界
當理想的刹那
因愛無分你的我的
即使很多一起過的
想起的通通你的
爲著是浪漫的愛情
通通都可再見但承諾可再聽
什麽可不變色
oh..baby
當晚與你記住蒲公英
今晚偏偏想起風的清勁
回憶不再受制于我我承認
回憶也許你的
當晚與你記住流水聲
今晚站在大地自己傾聽
難道送別你回頭總是虔誠
誰能怪我總是太感性
ALERT!!! DBS/POSB Bank Fake Website
That's when I suspected that something was wrong. So I called up DBS hotline and I was told that the website below is NOT their website. So DBS immediately cancelled my i-banking services and verified that none of my monies were transferred.
When I used my home computer and my colleague's office computer this morning to log on to DBS again, thankfully I was brought to the right website.
I think that either my office computer or DBS' website (or both) had been compromised. In any case, I sent DBS a print-screen copy of the website as well as details of the URL. They said they will investigate. The customer service officer said that there are some cases similar to mine that have been reported to them previously.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Tips for Female to reach Orgasm
1. Work on your pelvic floor muscles
Prepare for multitudes of earth-shattering orgasms by whipping your PC muscles into shape. To know what and where they are, next time you're on the loo, try stopping yourself peeing mid-flow. The muscles you clench up to stop yourself urinating are the PC muscles. The best bit about getting them fit and healthy is that you don't need to don footless tights and haul yourself to the gym – you can exercise them by clenching and unclenching them several times during a day. Spend a couple of weeks 'working out' and you'll find yourself having more, and better, orgasms
2. Relax
It sounds obvious, but you're unlikely to have a great orgasm if you're tense or stressed out. Light candles, have a bath, or go for a tension-busting walk and your chances of reaching orgasm are instantly increased. Just remember to avoid alcohol, which can numb the nerve endings in your vagina and make orgasm more difficult
3. Give your man a helping hand
Give yourself an orgasm head start by masturbating before you have sex. Some women find their pubic mound, nipples or inner thigh particularly sensitive... explore your own body and work out what works for you. Stroke, rub and caress yourself for a few minutes before your partner does and prepare for the Big O!
4. Get on top
An oldie but a goodie! Straddling your man means that you can take control of how fast, slow, or deep you want it, and watching him watch you can be a real turn-on as well. Position yourself on top of him and wiggle around a little so that your clitoris is in direct contact with his body, and try rotating your hips in slow circles to achieve an amazing orgasm
5. Have sex during your period
If you feel the yuck-factor is too high on this one, wait until your menstrual flow is at its lowest – towards the end of your period – to minimise the 'I've been shot where it hurts' look for your bloke. All the abdominal muscles and nerve endings are at their most sensitive during your period, which can make for some pretty explosive orgasms. And as a bonus, sex is a sure-fire painkiller if you're prone to nasty cramps
6. Try a variation on the doggy position
If he's especially well-endowed, try lying face down on a firm surface and have him enter you from behind. If you raise your hips a fraction and slip either yours, or his hand in underneath your body, you (or he) can stimulate your clitoris at the same time. This variation on doggy-style combines pressure from the front and the back and it feels pretty damn good!
7. Use lubricant
Sex can sometimes be less comfortable or enjoyable when your vagina is dry. This can happen at the beginning or end of your cycle, or if you've just removed a tampon to have sex. However, a touch of dryness can be easily remedied with one of the many lubrication products available on the market. Lube is also a great orgasm aid – a drop or two applied to the vaginal entrance will make sex more sensual for both or you, and with a bit of luck, more orgasmic
8. Try using a vibrator
Use a vibrator either on your own or with your partner – to achieve orgasm. Have your bloke sit on his knees (so that he can balance) and penetrate you while simultaneously stimulating your clitoris with a vibrator. It feels amazing...
9. Indulge in some oral pleasure
Most men don't need any encouragement to head downstairs - oral sex can be just as pleasurable for the man performing it as it is for the women receiving it. Encourage your bloke to gently lick, suck or nibble on your clitoris – whatever feels great – and then ask him to insert one or two fingers into your vagina so that he can stroke the very sensitive inner wall (where the g-spot is often located). Some women also find that having their perineum licked or a short-nailed finger inserted into their anus results in great orgasms
10. Invest in some adult entertainment
Ask a female staff member at your closest sex store to recommend a film that is especially erotic for women, and try watching it with your partner. You'll soon stop feeling freaked out at the sight of other people getting it on, and start encouraging your bloke to replicate some of the moves you're seeing on screen. Orgasms... here we come!
11. The modified missionary position
You don't need any fancy equipment for this orgasm booster... Lie on your back and put your legs over your partner's shoulders. Lifting your legs like this allows for easier clitoral contact and is also a goodie for stimulation of the g-spot. This position is practically orgasm-guaranteed
12. Stop worrying!
Many women fear that they are taking too long to orgasm or that their blokes get bored of the repetitive motions that are sometimes required for a woman to come. The more you fret, the more likely you are to fake... and that's not good for anybody. Enjoy all the sensations of sex and don't be concerned if you don't always orgasm – sex can be just as pleasurable for both parties without orgasms
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Malaysia Civil Servant Working Timetable
8:30 - 9:00 is discussion time (politics time) customer can wait while the civil servant has his sip of coffee/tea.
9:00 - 10:30 some work done but with a sullen face and discussing politics with customer.
10:30 - 10:45 Tea time (Cuepacs negotiated time) servants need not be at their workplace. Time unofficially extended till 11:00 o'clock.
11:00 to 12:30 some work done.
12:30 - 2:15 lunch hour. Extended lunch hour. ( gone for his luch - do not curse we work for our daily bread)
2:15 to 3:30 rest time after lunch. No work done
3:30 to 5:30 thousand and one reasons to go back home. Child sick, wife sick, buy motosikal/ kereta, attend income
Days work over. Chief Secretary to the government happy with the performance of the civil servant.